She said: "At 13, I would drink up to three litres of wine a day, followed by two bottles of Lambrini and perhaps a litre of vodka.

Yes, the positive side of having liver failure at 14 is that she'll die before she shrivels up like that.  Every cloud has a Patron Silver lining.

tojo2000 wrote:

Every cloud has a Patron Silver lining.

That will be part of the aspirational salespitch for "Functional Living," a Martha Stewart publication for those of us who don't want to stop.

"The main thing that needs to be done is for supermarkets to stop offering alcohol at pocket-money prices.

"It is so cheap at the moment it is ridiculous."

Damn, why can't they do that here? Maybe I need to move.

Bigcat wrote:

I wonder how much a case of beer is there. I would move to lighten the burden of my 30 pack a day beer habit.

I'm telling you now to move anyway - to a place where you don't NEED to drink 30 beers a day just to tolerate the extreme local ugliness and dumbfuckery.  Central/Western PA & the Fingerlakes region of NYS are about equal in terms of having your QOL lowered by your inbred cracker neighbors.  I've lived in and around a lot of shitholes and would prefer even bad areas of LA to rural PA - at least poor Black people have enough get-up-and-go to form gangs and rob people/stores.  Poor PA whites just do meth, get extremely fat somehow, and neglect/abuse their kids. 

Oh yeah, and they speak in some cramp-mouthed redneck patois that I find nearly impossible to understand.  I once asked for a case of beer that had not yet been chilled and the counter help tried to give me live bait instead.

How do you drink that much there and not go on killing sprees?  The last time I passed through, I stopped at a Wal-Mart and was tailed by security the entire time.  I believe I may have been the only person in the store with decent teeth, a healthy weight, and non-acid washed trousers -- I left without buying anything because it felt so George Romero in there.

tits_matilda wrote:

How do you drink that much there and not go on killing sprees?  The last time I passed through, I stopped at a Wal-Mart and was tailed by security the entire time.  I believe I may have been the only person in the store with decent teeth, a healthy weight, and non-acid washed trousers -- I left without buying anything because it felt so George Romero in there.

Who said I don't go on killing sprees?
Now Seriously, drop a couple of tabs and this all seems normal,really it does.

Just curious, your name isn't derived from Port Matilda perhaps?
(totally land locked ports with no water in sight, another huge tourist attraction)

tits_matilda wrote:

I know of the place, but my name = the nickname given to me by the gay boys when I was 14 and had just sprouted a fairly impressive rack.

Oh, I didn't realize you were that Tits Matilda.

Auto-edited on 2020-08-02 to update URLs